Kaffeeee (katznjeep) wrote in babies2003,

Sleeping Issues

Frustration. My 3 year old is not sleeping like I would like.
She has always started her night with me or her dad laying down with her to sleep in our bed, then eventually, if we aren’t too tired or lazy, we transport her to her room.

Problem: She does not always fall asleep in a timely manner, which causes one parent to have to go to bed early and stay in bed until she falls asleep. This cuts our night short and makes things difficult if there are other things that still need to get done. For a while she would stay in her own room after transport. Now she comes back into our room and either goes back to sleep in our bed or if it’s light out, thinks she needs to be up, or wants to sleep downstairs (but really wants to eat or watch TV).

What is the solution for getting her to start in her own room and stay there? When she was younger, we had her gated in, then we needed the gates for the new baby. We’ve now taken the gates down again. I am going to be a single parent soon. My husband is being deployed in a couple months for a year+ and I would like to be able to be up passed 8:30/9:00.
Any suggestions?

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My 4 year old is a really fitful sleeper. There are times when I get up in the morning and lights all over the 1st floor are on, or the TV is on.

I know what you mean about needing your sleep. I have a 6 month old as well and my husband deployed 6 weeks ago and isn't going to be done until next year. I haven't had a good night sleep since he left. Hopefully it will get better soon.

I have used these sometimes and they are great. I also use the teething tablets they make for the baby. I really like them because they homeopathic.
Angel did that for a while. I got her into a routine and she has no choice but to be in bed by herself no later than 8pm, 8;30 if she took a bath.

She cries about it on ocassion but usually is asleep pretty quick.
It takes time, routine and a bit of "mean mommy" moments to get them to stay in bed.

Angel will be 4 tomarrow and I love having the quiet evenings with her in bed.

My bad parenting:
She has a TV in her room and usually gets the choice of mickey mouse or my little pony before bed. Half the time she's out before the show is over. The other times she falls asleep after it's turned off.
Thanks for the input. I had a rough time of it last night. She was sobbing so hard, her dad finally went in and bribed her with a trip to McD's. It did quiet her down, but we won't be able to continue to do that.

Happy Birthday to Angel!
Single parenting is hard but dooable. I've been a single parent since the little wombat was born. It has the moments when you wish y ou could just lock them ina closet but most of the time a momma can handle it.

Be ready for the "where's daddy" Angel's grandfather(my dad) just got home from iraq. We put his picture on the wall and whenever she asked I pointed to the picture so she wouldn't forget grandpa.
Mom said when we were kids he was gone for 5 months and when he got back we didn't remember him to well.
Didn't want that to happen with his grand daughter and the picture ont he wall did work..

Figured I'd leave a note about that for yo u.
I agree with you completely. I have tons of pictures of Stephan around and showed her pictures of where he is so she has a mental picture and can visualize it.

We put a picture on the wall in her room and have a framed picture that she carries around with her and even started sleeping with it under her pillow. She tells him goodnight and gives him kisses. We have webcams so we can see each other and anytime he calls she talks to him. She thought it was so neat that he said seen camels!

My husband recorded a little video clip on the webcam so we could play the message anytime she would want to hear him.
Angel was more interested in the fact that he went on an airplane than anything else. She didn't understand he was in another country and would tell everyone he left on an airplane.
Thanks! I'm probably going to do that too, pictures will be everywhere. She will need that more than her sister. I don't think she will remember her daddy as much as AJ will.
That sucks. My heart goes out to you for your husband being deployed.
Does she take any naps? If so when? And how long?
I know if my son has a nap or quiet time he is usually up longer.
I would say routine is huge!!!
I would think putting her in bed with you would delay her sleeping properly?
If she gets up from her bed keep putting her back in bed. The first two nights will be hell but after that she will get it and sleeping will not be a problem.
Tough love sucks but our children need it.
Yeah, she takes naps. Unfortunately, I'm not home to "monitor" them. If I had my druthers, she'd have only a 2 hour nap. Some days its longer, but some days not at all. I've always tried to be mindful about how her nap will affect her bedtime. My husband, not so much.
I've tried to keep her bedtime pretty routine. It's just that one of us usually goes down with her. Last night was awful! She kept getting up and sobbing for someone to let her out of her room(I put a gate up). I can't believe how determined she is. I hope tonight is better.
There are also some really supportive military groups here. You can look though the ones on my profile page if you like. They really help sometimes when you want to vent you know that they understand because most have gone though it at some point.
Thank you so much! I will! I've been through this before, I think I'm looking for something different this time with this deployment. I don't know what though, but I will definitely take a look.
Watch Supernanny... She has some advice on that... it would be hard to start at first, but take her to her room and tell her she is a big girl and that she should sleep in her bed. The way Supernanny does it, has worked on my kids tremendously! I have three... one who just turned five and twins who are almost four... My son is out like a light and my girls share a room, so I am more firm with them...

Supernanny has you go in the room with the kid and explain it is time for bed, then a second time you take kid back in there and say bedtime, that is it, no other words. Then no words thereafter, just take them to their room... It really works, but only if you are consistent... It may take an hour or so the first few times, and occassionally afterwards they will push your buttons, but break the habit of her sleeping in your bed first, otherwise it will take a lot longer to break...

Hope this helps... There may be more insights on a website with Supernanny, but I love that show and it shows a lot of things on there that I need to work on and I work on it...
I love Supernanny!! I have instilled the naughty step. Not that my daughter needs it. She's perfect. Hah Hah.
I will browse the website when I have a chance. I never really thought to look there. I do remember watching it when there was a little girl that wouldn't go to sleep, and they kept having to put her back to bed, but she was a bit older. We'll see how tonight goes. Last night we resorted to bribery. I can't continue to do that. However, it did get her to stay in her bed. I'm the worst mommy ever.
Just to start off my post I want to tell you this won't be easy. I'm finally getting my 3 year old in his own bed after cosleeping w/ him for his first 3 years of life. We have a new baby on the way who I plan to cosleep with and there would not be enough room in our bed for all 4 of us.

So this is what I did. I told Logan it was bedtime, gave him a hug and a kiss, tucked him in and turned out the light. I made sure he had a night light and his closet light on, made sure he didn't have to pee or needed a drink, etc.

Then I left the room and let him cry it out. Obviously if he got too upset I would go in there, tuck him in again, tell him I loved him, etc. but you have to be strong, don't let her keep you in there. It was extremely rough for the first two or three nights but soon enough he figured out crying wasn't going to get mommy to sleep in his bed/him sleep in mommy's bed anymore.

Now he goes to bed with a bit of a fight but after he gets in bed he goes to sleep. He still doesn't always sleep through the night in his bed but we are slowly but surely getting there.

I usually don't notice he's come to bed with me until I've woken up in the morning so it's kind of pointless by then to take him back to bed however if I wake up in the middle of the night, I'll take him back to bed.

Good luck!
Thank you. I did the routine last night with the only difference being she had to stay in her own bed last night. Well, she eventually did, but only after Daddy bribed her. She screamed so loud, she woke up her sister, who then didn't want to go back to sleep.

I kept putting her back, and finally put up a gate, she did not like that (of course). The deal with us is we too have co-slept since she was born. I tried to get her in her own bed with the new baby being born, and she was fine until she got sick and we brought her back to bed with us. I know. So wrong!! Hopefully, this won't take too long or be too painful.
Good luck with your new baby!